


stolen time

by undodgedbullet



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, Space Wives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-01-15
Packaged: 2019-10-10 18:08:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17430908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undodgedbullet/pseuds/undodgedbullet
Summary: The Doctor and River accidentally bump into each other and the Doctor can't stay away no matter how much she knows she should.





	stolen time

“You guys can go back to the TARDIS. I know you’re all tired,” the Doctor says to Ryan, Yasmin, and Graham. They team had been out since the morning — the Doctor wanted to show them a very special meteorite that only happened at five AM. They didn’t quite understand why that meant _they_ had to get up that early; they travel in a time machine so why not wake up at a normal time and just travel a few hours earlier? But the Doctor had insisted so they forced themselves to get out of bed and go with her. “I still want to go back to that cafe and see if they have any of those lemon marshmallow flavored orange juices left!”

 

“Are you sure you’ll be all right by yourself, Doc?” Graham asks her, because he knows she gets into enough trouble when she’s with the three of them so he can’t even begin to imagine what she gets up to without them.

 

“You really want _another?_ ” Ryan asks in disbelief, the three companions all making a face as they remember the lemon marshmallow flavored orange juice. The Doctor had informed them it was a delicacy on this planet but as far as they were concerned, it was frankly disgusting.

 

“Of course I do, Ryan!” the Doctor says, almost offended that he would even ask that, seeming to be completely oblivious to her friends’ dislike of the drink. “And _of course_ I’ll be fine by myself, Graham. I’m only getting orange juice. What’s the worst that could happen?”

 

“Someone could kill you and leave us stranded here because we don’t know how to fly the TARDIS,” Ryan says and the Doctor makes a doubtful expression.

 

“Nah, I’ll be all right,” she insists, giving Ryan a light push in the direction of the TARDIS. “I’ll just get my drink and then I’ll return right away. Promise.”

 

“All right, fine,” Yasmin says. “It _is_ just orange juice.”

 

“See, Yaz trusts me!” the Doctor says, grinning at Yasmin in thanks.

 

“If anything at all happens, call us, okay?”

 

“ _Fine_ ,” the Doctor says. “I don’t know why you’re all being so insistent about this but okay, I’ll call you if anything goes wrong. Which won’t happen, because I won’t get into any danger!”

 

They say their goodbyes and the Doctor goes on her way. She only gets lost twice before she’s arrived at the cafe.

 

She takes a seat on a stool at the counter and orders her lemon marshmallow flavored orange juice, looking around the room as she waits. There’s not many people here anymore like there were when she came here earlier with Ryan, Yasmin, and Graham which is to be expected considering how much later it is. She hears the little bell that signals someone has entered the cafe and she turns to look, eyes immediately widening and limbs immediately freezing when she recognizes the person. There her dead wife is, walking and breathing, seeming just so _solid_ that the Doctor can almost pretend like she isn’t a ghost. The Doctor is ready to get up and leave; they can’t be here at the same time, especially not when she has this face, but she finds she can’t calm herself down enough to get her feet to cooperate. She realizes she’s probably been staring long enough that it’s noticeable so she turns the other way but continues to watch out of the corner of her eye. A part of her doesn’t want to believe that it’s really her; River not actually being here would be much easier than having to be just a few feet away from her but still having to hold back so she doesn’t completely mess everything up. She sighs and shakes her head to herself, she’ll just wait for her orange juice and ignore her. It’s a fail-proof plan.

 

Or, it _would_ be a fail-proof plan if River wasn’t currently making her way over to the Doctor. The Doctor pretends not to notice her but she feels her hearts beating faster and she wants to look, to just catch one more glimpse of the woman she loves, but she knows she can’t. Not only would it completely change their timelines but it’d be too painful — though, to be fair, she doesn’t know what could be more painful than sitting here and pretending like she’s _not_ dying to see or touch or hold or kiss her again.

 

“Hello.”

 

The Doctor is pulled out of her thoughts at the sound of her voice, something she never thought she’d ever get to hear again, and it takes her a moment to realize that _she’s_ the one River is talking to. She hesitates for a moment and then before she can stop herself, she turns and faces her. River is looking right at her with a smile that she knows all too well.

 

“Uh,” the Doctor replies, finding that she’s suddenly forgotten how to speak. There are so many things she wants to say but even if she could, words could never completely translate everything she needs to express. But River is still here smiling at her so she forces out, “Howdy.”

 

She hadn’t been trying to be funny but it makes River laugh and she stares, watching in awe as River’s eyes light up and her head tips back just a bit as she chuckles at what the Doctor has said. Even after all this time, the sound of River’s laughter is still the most beautiful thing she has ever heard. She wants to spend the rest of her lives hearing it.

 

She laughs as well, not quite knowing what she said that was so funny but River’s laughter is contagious and the two of them giggling together is something she hasn’t experienced in a very long time.

 

“Howdy,” River repeats, moving a strand of curls out of her face. The Doctor’s eyes track the movement, and she quickly looks down before River can notice she’s staring. River leans in slightly and the Doctor gets the feeling she’s being examined so she looks up to meet her eyes again. River leans back and shakes her head. “Sorry, for a moment I thought I knew you. You look familiar.”

 

“I get that a lot.” She shrugs and then opens her mouth again, about to tell River that she _does_ know her, that they know each other better than anyone else ever has, she doesn’t care anymore if it messes up their timelines but the waiter decides to come back at this moment with the Doctor’s drink.

 

“Here you go, ma’am. One lemon marshmallow flavored orange juice.” The Doctor makes a face at the title but she takes the drink with a smile, not missing River’s doubtful expression as she eyes the cup in the Doctor’s hands.

 

“It’s not as bad as it sounds,” the Doctor tells her.

 

The waiter turns to River, “Anything for you, ma’am?”

 

River considers for a moment and then nods. “I’ll have what she’s having.” The waiter gives her a look of surprise but heads into the back to make it and River turns to the Doctor. “So, what are you doing here so late in the night?”

 

“I’m just... traveling. I’m only here for one day so I thought I’d make the most of it,” the Doctor explains, and it certainly isn’t a lie so she says it easily and River nods. “I could ask the same thing about you.”

 

“I’m here on a business trip,” River says. The Doctor doesn’t know any details but this is River, so there must be some underlying thing she isn’t saying but right now they’re strangers and she can’t ask. “I was supposed to leave yesterday but there were some... complications.”

 

“Oh.” The Doctor doesn’t know what else to say, she’s not very good at being with her wife when her wife has no idea who she is. The last time this had happened was an entire regeneration ago but she had spent the entire time trying to tell River who she was and they ended up staying with each other for almost two decades. There was no way for that to be repeated, their time had come to an end when their night on Darillium was over. The two of them being together right now is an _accident_ , the Doctor has to remind herself, it is most definitely not further proof that they’ll always find each other no matter the circumstances.

 

“You keep staring,” River comments, snapping the Doctor out of her thoughts.

 

“What?” the Doctor asks, quickly shaking her head. This was a mistake, she should’ve gotten up and left the moment River walked in, she knew it was a bad idea to stay here when she could easily slip up and do or say something that would tell River who she really is. “No I wasn’t, I was— I just zoned out. I have a lot on my mind, that’s all.”

 

River looks amused at the Doctor’s stammering and thankfully the waiter takes this moment to come back and slide a cup in front of her. “Your drink, ma’am.”

 

“Thank you.” River takes a sip and she doesn’t show any signs of dislike on her face but the Doctor gets the feeling that she doesn’t love it because she doesn’t drink any more of it. “I have a hotel here. If you want to, you could come back with me and I can help you take your mind off what’s worrying you.”

 

“What?” the Doctor asks again, eyes widening because River’s voice suddenly sounds a lot more intimate than it had just moments ago and she now has a smile on her face that is much too suggestive for her to mean anything other than what the Doctor thinks she means.

 

“Just an offer,” River says, misreading the Doctor’s surprise as disinterest. “If you don’t want to—”

 

“No, I want to,” the Doctor interrupts before she realizes what she’s saying. There’s absolutely no way this can end well but she’d be lying if she said she wouldn’t give anything to spend more time with River. “But I— we don’t know each other.”

 

“I’m River.” She holds her hand out for the Doctor to shake.

 

The Doctor stares at it for a moment and then makes her decision, sliding her hand into River’s grasp and shaking it. “John.”

 

“Nice to meet you, John.” River smiles at her and the Doctor feels some of her nervousness slip away because even though it has been a very long time since the last time they saw each other in the Doctor’s timeline, every single thing about River is still overwhelmingly familiar to her. “Is that a yes, then?”

 

“I really shouldn’t but... yes,” the Doctor agrees. River stands up and the Doctor does too, searching in her jacket pockets for money to pay for her orange juice.

 

River puts down enough money to pay for both of their drinks and then winks at the Doctor. “My treat.”

 

The Doctor follows River out and they make their way to the hotel, the elevator taking them up a few floors to River’s room. They can’t seem to get there fast enough and they’ve barely shut the door when the Doctor corners her against it because she absolutely cannot wait even one more second.

 

“River,” the Doctor breathes because she never thought she’d get to be this close to her again, shutting her eyes as tight as she can as she leans in. It surprises River at first because the Doctor kisses her like she knows her, like the Doctor has spent hours and days and eternities memorizing her. The Doctor’s hands move anywhere they can reach, grasping at her as her raw need courses from her hearts into her veins and out where her lips meet River’s. It’s River who pulls away first because if it were up to the Doctor, they’d never be separated from each other ever again and River isn’t usually particularly impressed by kisses but she finds she’s left out of breath from this one. The Doctor places her hands on River’s shoulders to tug her towards her and she takes in the feeling of having River this close to her again, having never thought she’d get to experience this ever again.

 

The two of them doing this while River has no idea who the Doctor is certainly not the most opportune way the Doctor ever imagined this’d go if they got the chance but it’s better than nothing and she feels like she would die if she couldn’t at least have this. The Doctor murmurs River’s name again and she buries her hands in River’s hair, the feeling of those curls on her skin something she’s imagined so much all the time they’ve been without each other. She’s always loved River’s hair but now it doesn’t seem real; the idea of her seeing or touching it ever again was _impossible_ but here she is, those soft curls under her grasp. She doesn’t know how this happened but later she’ll have to go out and thank every star in the universe.

 

“John, maybe we should head over to the bed now?” River suggests and the Doctor leans in for another kiss before she holds River’s hand and pulls her a few steps to the bed. She takes no time at all in beginning to undress her and River gets an odd feeling of familiarity, like the Doctor’s fingertips against her are something she knows very well. This person in front of her is a stranger so there’s no reason why she should feel this way but the Doctor touches her as if she’s one of a kind, something to be treasured, and that is not how any stranger has ever been with her.

 

The Doctor takes her hand and presses a kiss to the back of it, knowing she should at least try to be more subtle before River begins to suspect something but she can’t help herself, not when River is soft and warm and beautiful and _alive_ right in front of her. She gives her a smile and gets started on why they’re even here in the first place, and River could almost cry when the Doctor’s fingers finally reach where River needs it the most. The Doctor has spent multiple lives learning every small bit of her but she doesn’t want this to just be over so she goes slowly, leaning in to kiss River so she won’t see the tears forming in her eyes.

 

She vaguely feels her jacket being pulled off and her braces being slid down her shoulders but her brain barely registers it. Everything just feels so completely surreal and the next thing she knows, her shirt has been tossed to the floor and the buttons of her trousers are already in the process of being undone. River’s touch has always made her feel disoriented but she still hasn’t gotten fully adjusted to this body yet and she can only gasp, everything seeming to be heightened because River knows her as well as she knows River, even though right now she’s just John, a name that holds no meaning to River. It hurts to think that this most likely has no effect on River, and after this she’ll go on with her day as if nothing had even happened, but the Doctor had known that going into this. It’s worth it because even though River won’t think anything of it, it means everything to the Doctor.

 

“River, I—” the Doctor begins but River shushes her because somehow she knows, the world spinning faster than either of them have ever experienced, and they go through it the same way they should go through everything: together.

 

The Doctor loses track of everything that isn’t River but it doesn’t matter because as far as she’s concerned, they’re the only two people in the galaxy. She lays down and pulls River down towards her, River obliges and rests her head on the Doctor’s chest. Neither of them feel the need to speak and they fall into a comfortable silence, the Doctor playing absentmindedly with River’s hair and River left to her questions of why she feels so connected to this woman who she had only met just an hour ago. She shifts a bit to find a more comfortable position and frowns.

 

“Is your heart not on the left side of your chest?” she asks, looking up at the Doctor in confusion.

 

“What do you mean?” the Doctor asks, equally as confused when River places her hand on the side of the Doctor’s chest that her head isn’t resting on. “Wait, River, no—”

 

“You have two—” River sits up quickly, as if she’s been shocked. “...Doctor?”

 

The Doctor is silent for a moment because this most definitely was _not_ what was supposed to happen. She sheepishly shrugs and offers a small smile. “Howdy.”

 

River laughs and the Doctor feels her hearts skip a beat even despite the situation. River shakes her head, if she didn’t have the proof then she’d be completely disbelieving. “ _How?_ ”

 

“It’s a long story. Mostly spoilers.” She takes River’s hand in hers. “I’m not supposed to even be with you right now. I’m borrowing this time. Well, actually, I’m not even giving it back so it’s stolen time.”

 

River brings her hand up to the Doctor’s cheek and she really looks at her, then nods. “Well, I really like the face. And the rest of you, too.”

 

The Doctor grins and looks away. “You know, I’m going to have to wipe all of this from your memory. You can’t know this regeneration exists.”

 

“Can’t you stay the night and do it in the morning?” River asks and the Doctor shakes her head, purposely still looking away but no longer smiling.

 

“It’d be too painful to wait any longer,” the Doctor says quietly. River pulls her into an embrace and for a moment the Doctor is tempted to stay and not force River to forget and deal with the consequences later, ready to do anything as long as it meant she’d never have to leave River’s arms, but she knows she’s already messed River’s life up enough and River deserves more than that. She pulls away and presses a kiss to River’s forehead. “Okay?”

 

“Okay.” River nods and they both lean in, their lips connecting and their minds opening. The Doctor goes straight to what she’s looking for in River’s mind, knowing that if she lingers then she’ll never leave, and River feels a vivid _I love you_ before everything is gone.

 

* * *

 

 

The TARDIS doors open for her on their own accord, as if the ship knows what she has just gone through. She brushes her hand against the wall as she enters and feels the comfort that’s trying to be communicated to her, offering a tired smile that doesn’t quite meet her eyes. She makes her way to the console and she sits with her back against it, rubbing her eyes with her hands. She can’t remember the last time she felt so drained.

 

“Doctor!” she hears from somewhere down the corridor, footsteps making their way towards her. She looks up and sees one of her best friends. “Doctor, where have you been? We told you to call us if anything went wrong!”

  
“Nothing went wrong, Yaz,” the Doctor tells her. “For once, something actually went right.”


End file.
